Full disclosure: I have never been a fan of Burger King. Even when I ate fast food burgers, theirs were my least favorite, and not just because BK, like McDonalds, does not offer mayonnaise as a condiment — a deadly insult to my taste in fries, which once caused Moon Monkey housemate Penny to tell me “Sometimes you’re so Dutch it hurts.” (Need mayo with your fast food fries? Wendy’s and Roy Rogers both provide. I’m just sayin’.) But: back to burgers, and my dislike of Burger King’s in particular (in case you were wondering, there’s a point to this diatribe: I want to write about a few weird BK advertising campaigns, so I thought I should make my prejudices clear ahead of time).
Here is the reason for my beef with Burger King burgers (ha, ha, pun intended), above and beyond similar-ish offerings at other places: in pursuit of the dubious goal of making fast food crappiness taste “flame broiled,” BK does something to their mystery meat patties that makes them taste like smoke, which I hate. To me, smoke tastes like failure. Continue reading